click to enlarge:
I just posted these comments on Facebook, in regard to this painting:
"Inappropriate? I just did this commission over the weekend, per very specific requests by the client. I enjoyed bringing it to life, and concerned myself with color, shape, beauty, design, etc... But afterward, I realized that this was not simply a nude/fantasy study, it was a sexual tease. That lowers it from the classical tradition to something in the trailer park tradition, I suppose."
Anyway... It's acrylic on wood panel, 24" X 36"...
But, you know, as I do more and more paintings, I learn more and more, and I'm gaining confidence. But I have a serious problem: I'm making almost no money. Murals, portraits, signs, special little commissions... and of a high quality, it seems to me. Of course, I'm still LEARNING TO PAINT fundamentally, but I have the feeling that I'm HERE, I've made it! Woo-hoo! I can paint realistically! And... I'm freaking starving! Woo-hoo!
Honestly, today, I woke-up with no money AT ALL in my pocket or the bank, and little gas in the van. I drove to my studio (yes, I have a studio now) and finished the lettering on the mermaid sign. I then drove to the client's home. Not home. I so I drove back to my sailboat and parked. No breakfast, no lunch. Some tuna and rice on the boat, but I'm saving that for tonight so I'll have something in my stomach to help me sleep. I finally catch-up with the client in the afternoon. He loves it, but he wants it varnished. Cool. I drive by to the sailboat and park, because I'm nearly out of gas. I walk two miles to my studio and retrieve the varnish, and walk directly back to the sailboat, and varnish the painting. I then walk to the client's house, CARRYING the painting over my head. He loves it still, and says he'll pay me in a couple of weeks. I walk back to the sailboat, still broke, still hungry, and more and more disillusioned.
Anyway, later, I was given some food without even asking, which I devoured immediately.
Tonight, I have the very clear thought that I am finally a classical artist, and always will be, and that this is my life's intent... and that I'll never make a decent living doing it. I've never been a better artist, and I've never been so wretched.